Speed Dating - 1

To tell you the truth, it was awful. I`ll never go for it again. Of course, the cafe was wonderful. There was lovely furniture and good service, but partners... So a few words about them:

1. He seemed to be a simple boy. He resembled 90% boys that existed on the Earth. We had a chat. And he wanted to show that he was a star, but failed it. He said: "Once I was shown on the TV, really. I gave an interview when I was in a juvie".
2. He was as nice as a picture. His eyes were blue, he had chestnut hair, he was tall. But he was old-fashioned and his manners seemed to had been taken after robots. As it happened he was a dancer. To cut a long story short, it`s not my type of men.
3. He wasn`t alone. His dog was with him. He said the dog always slept with him. I imagined myself to be the third and felt blue.
4. The next one was really cheerful. His name was Ahmed. He invited me to his shop which was working all day long and promised to treat me with kebab or shawerma.
5. That time I met a beautiful man. As for his way of life, he slept half a day and then played computer games. He told me a lot about DOTA2, THE WOLRD OF TANKS and so on and so forth.
6. That one was yogi. So I got to know something new about "right" hairstyles, a special diet which was "the rightest one in the whole world" and even some facts about useful heroin, as a matter of fact.
7. The seventh one was a body-builder. So there was no themes to speak about except for his strong ans handsome body.
8. The next one was a gispy. He had five golden teeth. He was a really happy person, but he should marry a gisoy. So his aim was only to have fun.
9. The ninth one was a nationalist. Everything had passed well untill my phone rang and the melody was: "Everything is for you" by Stas Mikhaylov. Thanks to God, I am still alive.
10. And the last one wasn`t less strange. He said that it was important to try everything when you are young. So he had an experience of eating snakes, smoaking foam plastic, doing dog-enjoyment and now he wanted to try different types of women. By the way, why not to try to be a kind person? I didn`t manage to understand him.

Finally, I decided that the speed dating is a mistake and a wasting of time for me.

P. S. : I don`t correct the word "juvie". Its meaning is "колонія для неповнолітніх". Thank you for your recomendations! I`ve apreciated them!