Okay, can I talk to you about my speed dating experience? Well, honestly I had been thinking, that it isn't right way for looking for a romantic partner. But some months ago my best friend assuring me to try it at least one time. I didn't feel optimistic mood and didn't be confident, but I decided to do it really at least one time. So, we went to a nice night cafe, where were a lot of different boys. Honestly, from the first sight I couldn't find at least a handsome one. There were ugly guys and men. I saw only dream to drink alcohol in them eyes. It seemed, that nobody went to have a really serious relationship. That night I met a lot of boys, but only three were not so bad. The first boy explain me, that he want to become a businessman and to have a loving family, but now he is just a gardener in in the central park. Second man was really handsome and attentive to me, but I think he wasn't sincere that night. In a nutshell, third man was also attentive and skillful in talking with girls. So, it is obviously, that he has a lot of passionate phrase for every girl. Of course, it was nice, but also not sincere.
So, I made decision, that speed dating isn't for me different way.
Anyway, why I am sure, that speed dating is a bad idea? From my point of view, it isn't right way to find the best romantic partner or a man for the life. Spending time very well and with attractions is the motto of it. It is more better to go to speed dating for having an interesting conversation, developing communicative skills and making new friends, maybe. In general, to cut a long story short, the fate will find you, when you aren't looking for, anyway...!
Great story! Your conclusion is especially good!
ReplyDeleteBut I have noticed some mistakes in your text:
- In first sentence it is right to say "can I tell you about..."
- I think you should use Present Perfect tense and preposition "of" instead "for" in 2 sentence: "...I HAVE been thinking, that it isn't right way OF looking..."
- It is better to say "I wasn't confident" instead "didn't be confident" in third sentence.
Hi, Ann. Your story is very interesting. But I noticed a few mistakes in your story:
ReplyDelete-"I saw only dream to drink alcohol in them eyes." Maybe it's better to say "in their eyes"
-"The first boy explain me". To my mind it's better to use Past Simple, acording to the text. "explained me"
- the same mistake "that he has a lot of passionate phrase for every girl." Past Simple :"that he had a lot of passionate phrase for every girl.'
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ReplyDelete1. It isn`t A right way...
ReplyDelete2. ...where THERE were a lot of different boys...
3. "just a gardener IN IN the central park"
4. THE second man was really handsome...: THE third man was also attentive
5. Second man was really handsome and attentive to me, but I think he wasn't sincere that night. In a nutshell, third man was also attentive and skillful in talking with girls. So, it is obviously, that he has a lot of passionate phrase for every girl. Of course, it was nice, but also not FRANK.
6. Anyway, why AM I sure...
7. In general, to cut a long story short - to many parentheses at a time
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ReplyDeleteHi, Anna! Your story is nice, I really liked it. You did a great job! I've never gone to speed dates, but I hope that they are not so awful as you describe them. Also I hope, your fate will find you :)
ReplyDeleteSome mistakes in your story were already mentioned above, so I`ll write a few more:
1) “But some months ago my best friend assurING/ED me to try it at least one time”. When we are talking about the actions in the past we should use past tense.
2) In the sentence ”I didn't feel optimistic mood and didn't be confident, but I decided to do it really at least one time” it’s better to say “I didn't HAVE optimistic mood and WASN’T confident, but I decided to do it really at least one time.”
3) “Honestly, from the first sight I couldn't find at least a handsome one.” In English we use the expression “AT the first sight”.
4) In the sentence “I saw only DREAM to drink alcohol in THEM eyes.” It’s better to say “I saw only DESIRE to drink alcohol…”, also in this sentence you should use the pronoun THEIR instead of THEM.
5) In the sentence “It seemed, that nobody WENT to have a really serious relationship” it’s better to say “nobody WANTED to have a really serious relationship” .
6) “The first boy EXPLAIN me, that he WANT to become a businessman and to have a loving family, but now he is just a gardener in in the central park”. We should use Past Simple “The first boy EXPLAINED me, that he WANTED to become a businessman…”
7) In the sentence “So, it is obviously, that he HAS a lot of passionate PHRASE for every girl” we should use Past Simple “he HAD” and the plural form of the noun “phraseS”.
8) “Of course, it was nice, but also not SINCERE” it’s better to use adverb “SINCERELY”.
9) As for me, in the sentence “So, I made decision, that speed dating isn't for me DIFFERENT WAY.” It’s better don’t use the phrase “different way”.
10) “It is MORE better to go to speed dating for having an interesting conversation, developing communicative skills and making new friends, maybe”, we should use only the word combination “it is better to go….”. The comparative degree of monosyllabic adjectives is usually formed by adding -er at the end of the adjective, possibly with the final consonant doubled, e.g. taller or bigger, and some are irregular, such as “better” (not “gooder”). Longer adjectives are usually compared using “more” (e.g. “more expensive”, “more important”). When something is “better”, it is always just “better” and never “more better”:
11) In the last sentence “In general, to cut a long story short, the fate will find you, when you aren't looking for, anyway...!” it’s better to use or word combination “in general” or the phrase “to cut a long story short”. Also you forgot to use pronoun “the fate will find you, when you aren't looking for IT, anyway...!”
Please, read my remarks to avoid such mistakes in the further writings.